I was just looking at a set on Polyvore, by Thea Maia who creates amazing portraits with the Polyvore editor. This portrait is of the artist Alphonse Mucha, and she mentions the view she shares with him, that art should be available to the masses. As a result of this view, he allowed his work to be used in marketing.

Reading this, I thought of the logo for the Arizona lottery–mainly the image of the miner that’s part of it. It’s terribly–and barely, really–designed. Not even as nice as the lousy clip art that comes loaded with Microsoft Office. It’s bothered me before, because it’s representative of the lousy images used in marketing to the poor and undereducated. I’ve had misgivings on caring about this kind of thing–after all, I think the tenor of advertising generally, regardless of the market in question, is alarming and harmful. So if the imagery is even less uplifting when directed at lower socio-economic classes, isn’t that comparatively unimportant?

But reading Ms Maia’s description of Mucha’s application of his views has me thinking that my gut reaction was right. If the images we see, even in vapid commercials and advertisements, stimulate us aesthetically, then perhaps we will have a better shot at growing and developing as human beings.

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Underdressed

I have a group on Polyvore these days, devoted to sets involving underwear as outer wear and other kinds of sets that imply showing “too much” skin publicly. I’ve intentionally invited a variety of styles and influences, not all necessarily in styles I like. That’s important to me–to welcome sets that maybe I don’t like by Polyvorians who don’t do things in a style that pleases me. And for them to win in contests if I think that, my taste or not, it’s a good, creative set.

I hesitated on referencing Lady Gaga, because as a rule I dislike celebrity-oriented sets. But, well, see above. There are certain styles of Lady Gaga sets that are indeed underdressed. So I added it.

I’ve done one collection of underdressed sets, both to give examples to members and to promote the club discretely and non-offensively, and I’m working on another. So since I’d added Lady Gaga to the list of possible inspirations, I decided I ought to include some sets inspired by her looks. I looked out for images of her in underdressed outfits and checked out the sets that had used those. It’s probably silly, but the number of sets I saw that took those daring, body-baring pictures of her, in clothes that we know damn well she’d wear publicly, on stage and off, and used them as inspiration for modest outfits saddened me.

With the exception of ”Bad Romance” (which is good pop, however much I may hate to admit it), I don’t care for her music. I’m not into the cult of personality around her, and really, I don’t usually care for the underdressed looks she favors. That said, from what I’ve seen, she does seem to do her own thing stylistically, and that’s pretty rare, so good for her. I also liked what Amanda Palmer had to say about attending LG’s concert, about the free-spirited revelry in dress that she saw there. So it seems like a bastardization of that to conservatize what she herself does. Maybe make it more out there, if you can, but please, don’t make it less.

That’s all.

Commitment to what?

Dogmatic monogamists have a tendency to deride non-monogamists as commitment phobic–and then often state that if their significant other were to want an open relationship, they’d walk away. Um. Is that commitment to a relationship, or commitment to monogamy itself, and damn the relationship, damn the person they claim to love?

Around the time that I decided against monogamy for myself, I had an epiphany: Most romantic relationships (certainly not all) end for one of two reasons. Either one of the parties to the relationship falls in love (or lust) with someone else, or the relationship changes to something other than what it was. In the latter case, when one is committed to monogamy, and not to the person, the only real choice is to break up and find something more like what they need elsewhere. A non-monogamous couple, typically, will let their relationships change as they change, and let love win and morph.

Maybe it’s not wrong for someone to be more committed to monogamy than to the person they’re doing it with, so long as both of them are on the same page, open and honest about it. But the idea that one party to the relationship might suggest an open relationship while the other rejects even the possibility of a relationship of any kind belies that premise.

I read an article at Time magazine, regarding changes in court rules to prevent hung juries, and I found it alarming. That I care, even as an anarchist, is probably a hold over from my libertarian and believer in the strict constructionist view of the Constitution, adjudicated by founders intent. But still.

The changes in question are these:

• Allowing jurors to ask questions, either during the trial (vetted by the judge) or during deliberation.
• Allowing jurors to take notes.
• Allowing jurors to discuss the case amongst themselves prior to deliberation.
• Requiring less than a unanimous decision.

I don’t see a problem with note-taking necessarily–although I see the traditional point that it can be a distraction, which may be more relevant now than it ever was given the decreased attention span of Americans. Beyond that, however, I find these ideas to be a concern, and seem to take away the responsibility of the prosecution to truly prove their case before potentially locking someone up in a cage.

I’m a firm believer in jury nullification–the citizen’s right to throw out a case on the basis of bad law. That is best served by one or more individuals hanging the jury, so I think that, in criminal cases, at the least, unanimity should definitively be required. There was mention in the article that Oregon requires only 10 people agree “unless a defendant’s life is on the line.” Now, considering that prison can ruin a person’s life, regardless of how long they spend there, and increasingly so the longer they spend there, I find that kind of adjoinder unsettling.

Obviously I have a problem with the underlying assumption of reforms like this–that hung juries are to be avoided by using court procedures, instead of by correcting the laws and by actually better proving and presenting the arguments.

I guess it shouldn’t surprise me, when people generally bitch that defense attorneys get their clients off on technicalities. Never mind that those “technicalities” are instances of prosecutors and cops breaking the law themselves. Never mind that cops and prosecutors are too lazy to actually figure out who committed a crime.

Anyway…

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Hubba.

Hot chica with a guitar

Alone

A few years ago I met an old hippie. A roommate had him over–the father of some girl he was screwing. We all sat around and smoked out, and I came out with some of the stuff I think, the things I believe in. The hippie pressed me for some more details and we had a good conversation about how the world really is.

He cried. He cried because it was the first time in a very long time that he had heard anyone who looked under the surface of what’s around us, what we live in all the time, and found some of what’s really happening–and it was both joy and sadness at once. He laughed, bitterly, that once he had said, as many of his generation did, “Never trust anyone over 30,” and he had come to believe the opposite. He asked me, “Are there more of you?” I started to say yes–and probably there are, somewhere–but I don’t have a lot of evidence. I’ve met a lot of anarchist scenesters, on both shores of the country, and I relate with some, to an extent–and certainly my honey as well as my ex–but for the most part, they’re as clueless as any of the Target-addicts I work with. The ones I related to the best were often outside the “mainstream”anarchist sets themselves. So I could only shake my head and tell him, “I don’t think so.”

It meant a lot to me that this curse, this blessing, of what I believe in, what I understand, could resonate with someone I met in passing like that.I think above all it gave him a sense of not being alone. I got the sense that the extent to which he’d gone more or less right-wing–probably essentially (american) libertarian, with less mellowness–because he was alone, and in some ways they get it, too, even if they don’t in all or enough.

I used to really relate to a line from Rage against the Machine–

Yes I dwell in hell, but it’s a hell that I can grip

I think I might still feel that way, but I’ve buried a lot of what I feel and think to get along in a corporate environment. It’s not that it’s gone, but it’s less accessible. And I’ve been lucky that I’ve not really been alone since I became an anarchist. That was in May of 2001, and even before 09/11 happened, I had a great chat room of like-minded people I could let loose with. Before the year was out I’d run off with an anarchist–in an exaggerated manner of speaking–and I haven’t really looked back.

But if I were alone, if I didn’t have anyone who understood in my life, if I’d started to doubt whether there was anyone who really thought like me… I think that’s why I was so glad to have given him that bittersweet moment.

Suicide

This is a topic of great philosophical importance to me. Partly as a result of my politics–personal autonomy and all–and partly of my longstanding depression.  It’s not something I’m flippant about, although I really enjoy good suicide songs, and it’s not something I advocate. I see it as a lot of complexities, and as a choice, but not one to be made lightly or quickly.

I just read a blog entry from someone who recently lost a friend to suicide. I’m not linking to it or tracking back to it, because I do understand the writer is in pain, and while I’m writing in response to the post, I don’t want to fuck with–or seem to aim to fuck with–someone who’s grieving. This isn’t about that.

The writer wrote about suicide being fundamentally selfish, and went on to say that she wouldn’t kill herself because of the heartaches and headaches she would leave behind. This was not all she said on the topic, and did seem to see the possibility for more complexity, even as she said she couldn’t comprehend such. But the selfishness accusation is common–more so even than the other cliche, “it’s a permanent solution to a temporary problem.” And it’s one I have a problem with.

Because to say that someone in pain, particularly pain one cannot fathom oneself, should make the decision that’s easier for everyone else–that’s inherently selfish too. It also seems to imply that the person holding the opinion believes it to be okay for a person to live for another. Ideally, someone who’s suicidal can turn to the people they care about–for help in preventing it, for help in deciding what to do, for a hand in the last moments, if it comes to that. I’ve done both of the first two, and I’ve been lucky that I had the support for that.

But someone dealing with people who throw the label of selfish on them, while being selfish themselves–that person has no one to turn to, not really. I’ve asked my honey to stay with me, near me, because I’m hurting so much and I have these thoughts and feelings I don’t want to act on and I don’t trust myself. And he’s just been there for me without judgement.

I remember a number of years ago, I was friends with a gal who was going through depression and suicidal feelings at a time when I was also. And we talked about it. Haltingly at first, and as we realized we had a safe space, more firmly, defining how we felt–including not wanting to follow up on it, not really, while also be fascinated with it. She was in a rougher situation than I, having kids. Because some might determine she wasn’t a fit parent, and “alert the authorities”. Meanwhile, her kids were a large part of her motivation for keeping on.

And that’s part of my problem with the cliche responses to suicide–it leaves people  in pain alone. I know I was scared to talk about it for a long time. There are the cliches, and there’s also the drama–people threatening it rather than talking about it. Then in our teens, there’s the very real possibility of being locked up–hell, I think in some places that danger continues into adulthood. I know I hesitated to even talk about it with doctors, in conjunction with my depression as an adult.

I talked with my gal pal. I had an online friend I could talk with about it, too. My ex and I had an agreement that I wouldn’t end my life without talking with him first. And my honey, as I’ve said, has supported me as well. I’ve been lucky and I tend to be around people with somewhat developed philosophies at hand instead of cliches. But regardless, it seems like not many people have that. Hell, maybe some suicides had the same damned cliched reactions themselves–and suddenly, faced with this enormous pain, these overwhelming feelings of wanting to die–they just acted on it.

That’s all.

Tony Benn is neat.

Tony Benn is a lovely man. I read his recent call to resistance of England cutting social services etc. One reason I checked it out was that my honey had told me about him, in the context of his being interviewed by Ali G. From that conversation, I knew Benn had written about his interview, so I looked to see if it was available. And it was.

I found Benn’s kindness in describing the character who interviewed him to be so refreshing, especially having seen the character in action. Benn found Ali G to be ignorant, mostly informed by tabloid headlines, but also very courteous, respectful, and open to reason. It would be easy to guess the former MP would be a snob–though that goes against what he stands for–but he looked beyond how Ali G said things, to the substance underneath. It was heartwarming.

I think I want to be English….

Hair

I’ve been doing the 90s skater guy look for awhile now. Very short in back, angling to longer in front. I’m not really a styling kind of gal so it has to hold its own. Now, a couple of weeks ago, I forgot my badge at work, and security took my picture for a temporary badge. So, it’s 7am and I’m grouchy and my hair’s still wet from the shower–and I loved the picture! No smile, almost glaring, and my hair was pushed behind one ear while being kind of flipped out on the other side. New haircut inspiration!

I’ve realized that new wave is what I’m thinking of, and I’ve also realized that it was a precursor to those skater boy haircuts I’ve always liked so much. So now I’ve been looking for some fun images to maybe take next time I get a haircut.

It’s funny. I tend to like asymmetrical hair, but most of it is pretty much too out there for this time and place in my life, and I don’t know if my nerve would hold. But here I go, heading into those waters, so who knows where it will go?

On ass…

I have a nice ass. Maybe a little big these days, but it’s always been shapely and definite. Boobs–not so much. Well, at least not stand out. Ahem. I did play with padded bras at various points. Sometimes insecurity, sometimes for fashion. Still I’m amused to see news of  this item for enhancing one’s ass. I suppose because it was something I always had (and did generally garner admiration of from lovers), and now it’s something that’s more broadly desired.

That said, I think almost all women have a variety of really lovely, hot things going on for them. I myself love asses and hips–particularly hips–and shaplely legs. But I also love that subtle jiggle most of our breasts have–and even the not-so-subtle jiggle! Bellies–flat, rounded, or muscled–can be lovely as all get out. I guess I just think women are neat. Though I will say the hottest attribute a woman can have, to me, is the ardent expression of high ideals.